Monday, May 22, 2006
  The D9 And Why Some People Hate Caterpillar

The Caterpillar D9 bulldozer is Caterpillar's most notorious piece of equipment. It weighs about 54 tons and is powered by a 474 HP Cat diesel engine. Not only is it capable of razing an entire town with its 13 foot blade and optional ripper attachment, it also serves a very important position in the mining, forestry, construction, and waste management sectors.


But some leftist hippies have labelled the Caterpillar Corporation as one of the most evil corporations in American History. The D9 has found a niche in many military applications, probably due to its ejaculation of raw intimidation and the ability to strike fear into any poor schmuck who is unfortunate enough to find himself in front of it. In the mid 1960's, the Israeli military bought a bunch of D9s and fabricated an armor system rendering them impervious to any type of small arms fire, RPG's, land mines, and sniper fire. The resulting armor conversions added about 15 tons to the D9, bringing its gross tonnage to 69 tons. The Israelis even took it a step further and installed crew operated machine guns, grenade launchers, and air conditioning in them, thus turning the bulldozer into a full blown war machine, which the Israelis lovingly refer to as "The Dooby". Being the savages that they are, the Israelis used the new and improved Killdozers to destroy entire Palestinian towns and raze Palestinian olive plantations. In urban warfare and counter-terror operations, the D9s has also been used in standoff situations with opponents barricaded in buildings. In order not to risk Israeli soldiers, the D9 shakes the house until the barricaded gunmen surrender. After the building is evacuated, the D9 razes the structure in order to detonate and bury any explosives that remain inside. Hamas chief bombmaker and the plotter of the Passover massacre, Case Aduwan, was killed in April 7, 2002, after he was tracked by the SHABAK and the YAMAM and a D9 destroyed the house he was hiding after heavy exchanges of fire. In Hebron, the IDF used the armored D9 to stop the local Hamas leader, Bassal Qawasameh, who shot at the D9 with machinegun, but was killed when the D9 demolished the house where he was hiding. One year after, Imad Qawasameh surrendered to IDF forces, after a D9 started demolishing his house. Armored D9 bulldozers have demolished many structures in Rafah, Gaza strip during battles with militants and operations to uncover smuggling tunnels. The destruction of hundreds of structures in Rafah is a highly controversial issue. The Israel Defense Forces claim that the destruction of buildings and tunnels is a security necessity and that most houses destroyed were used for terrorist activity. However, Palestinians claim that the destruction has left thousands of people homeless, and is done systematically in order to create a cleared "buffer zone" between Rafah and Philadelphi Route. Protests against this destruction have caused further controversy, through such as incidents as the death of civilians such as Rachel Corrie. According to Jewish Voice for Peace (a left-wing group whose goal is to prevent selling of Caterpillar equipment to Israel) "since 1967 Israel has used Caterpillar bulldozers to demolish nearly 9,000 Palestinian homes, leaving more than 50,000 people homeless. Since the outbreak of the Palestinian uprising in September 2000, Israel has razed the homes of 12,737 Palestinians in the West Bank and Gaza Strip. In the past two years the Israeli army deployed Caterpillar bulldozers to uproot 1,000,000 Palestinian olive trees." However, many dispute JVP claimed figures, mainly because the IDF operates many different kinds of bulldozers and engineering vehicles, most of them are civilian tools on licensing.

Also Bong.

Caterpillar maintains that it has no say over what any of its customers do with its products once purchased, even though the hippies still won't stop bugging them.

Many people mistake Marvin Heemeyer's Killdozer for a Caterpillar D9, but it is in fact a Komatsu D335A. His improvised armor was based on the IDF design for their D9's.

As far as I'm concerned, Caterpillar can keep selling D9's until the Israelis and Palestinians wipe themselves out of existence.

Peace out.
The Most Notorious? Interesting.

Damn hippies, hatin' on Caterpillar. They be the shiznit. We have a D3, which is much smaller, obviously, than the D9. But you can still cut a good foot of undisturbed grade, no problem. Prolly could walk right through a shed or a small garage in stride, but with the open-air cab, I'd be hesitant.

If I was going on a destruction spree, I'd get a thumb-equipped Cat 385, armor that bitch up, and go king-kong on some shit. I'm talking about being able to grab a 15-ton truck by the scruff of the neck, lift it 45 feet in the air, and toss it the fuck aside.

You might have some trouble getting away, though, since it tops out at 2.8mph.
Oh yeah, they also have D10s and D11's. The D11 weighs around 125 tons.
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